Mindful Relating
To help universities build a culture of consent, we offer Mindful Relating workshops to support students' wellbeing, relating skills, and mental health. Through solo, paired and group exercises we teach active listening, mindfulness, noticing and expressing personal boundaries, and regulating the nervous system.
There is now overwhelming evidence that mindfulness based interventions (MBI's) support mental health. Mindful Relating recognises that improving mental health and wellbeing is not a purely solo endeavour. This is especially true for students living, working and playing in close proximity to each other. In addition, these practices can be helpful for people both with and without any specific mental health issues.
Mindful Relating is located at the intersection of mindfulness and consent, as shown below:
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​Mindfulness means paying relaxed attention to the present moment, for example by focusing awareness on one of our five senses. It is often seen as a solo practice, but can also be applied to all our interactions with others.
Mindfulness also helps regulate our nervous system, which can be invaluable in supporting our wellbeing, resilience and mental health, especially during stressful or challenging periods of our lives.
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Consent means making clear, informed agreements with others in all areas of life. This includes with friends and family, as well as in our most intimate connections with others, including sexual consent.
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Mindfulness improves our consent skills by helping us listen more attentively to others, whilst also supporting us to notice and get clearer about our personal boundaries.
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Wellbeing, Consent and Mindfulness
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All UK universities are now required to provide consent education for their students. New E6 guidelines from the Office for Students (paragraph 26) state that trainings on sexual consent and bystander training should be "designed and delivered by persons with credible and demonstrable expertise." This is exactly what the Art of Consent offers. Our professional team of facilitators have many years' experience working in this field.
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However, our experience also tells us that a one-off, hour-long consent workshop, whilst being an essential first-step, is highly unlikely to generate the sea-change required to build a genuine culture of consent across our universities.
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This is why we have developed further trainings to help students embed both the principles and practices of consent.
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The most popular of these is Mindful Relating, which brings together training on personal boundaries, embodied awareness, listening skills and nervous system regulation. Importantly, these are offered as practices, rather than only as concepts - because a confidently felt sense of bodily awareness is key to students knowing what their personal boundaries are - sexual or otherwise.
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What happens in a Mindful Relating session?
In our friendly, informal sessions, students are invited to try a range of solo, paired and group interactive exercises. There are plenty of opportunities to discuss, reflect on and ask questions about their experience. Students are also welcome to opt out at any time - because consent is key. A typical session might include some or all of the following:
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Active Listening:
In pairs, students take it in turns to practice listening attentively, without interrupting, while the other speaks. Research shows that feeling heard and understood helps improve mood and mental health.
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Awareness of the Five Senses:
There are many different kinds of mindfulness practice which have been shown to help support mental health. Bringing awareness to each of the five senses in turn is also widely used to calm anxiety. We therefore offer this practice, both to help the group co-regulate in the session, and also as a useful skill students can take away with them.
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Noticing and Expressing Boundaries:
We invite students to notice and express their boundaries and preferences during simple structured interactions with others. The exercise is held in an easeful and light way, yet often generates valuable insights for those taking part.
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Understanding the Nervous System:
We offer teaching and discussion about how the nervous system up-regulates and down-regulates in response to external situations and internal moods. By noticing and understanding this process, students are better placed to take action or seek support if problems arise.
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Waking the Hands:
This is a simple, self-regulating practice developed by Dr. Betty Martin of the Wheel of Consent. It helps us slow down, pay more attention to and perhaps even find pleasure in the here and now, through exploring our sense of touch using a simple, everyday object.
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​Throughout the sessions, students are invited to share and reflect on their experiences, in pairs and in the group. Mindful Relating practises recognise that supporting our mental health and wellbeing is not a purely solo endeavour. This is especially true for students living, working and playing in close proximity to each other. Instead, by bringing more awareness, clearer boundaries and better communication skills to all our interactions with other people, we can support each other to build a culture of consent and wellbeing for everyone. These practices can be helpful for people both with and without any specific mental health issues.
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The Art of Consent is a team of professionals with a wealth of experience in delivering consent and mindful relating workshops. If you are responsible for arranging consent training for students at your university, we can offer you a free 20-minute zoom call to talk through your options and see if the Art of Consent might be a good fit for your university or college.
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